Oh, Charles
Oh, Charles, such joy you bring to my life. It is a shame I have neglected you this semester but rest assured, my friend; next semester will be different.
Chaz and I spent some bonding time together tonight. We each brought our own specialty to the table : I brought marijuana, and Chaz brought the frame of mind with which one permits themself to get intoxicated on a Tuesday. The result was glorious.
I, experienced in the ways of the mighty cheebah, was brought to my knees during one of Chaz's rants; you see, I had never before understood 4:20. While waiting at the White Castle drive-thru, I noticed that it was 7:20. I chucked and said "It's 4:20 somewhere".
Then Chaz said, "Hey, you know how stoners have 4:20? Like the time when you're supposed to smoke if you can? Well, I just realized that 5'o'clock is the drinker's 4:20!"
I shook so violently that I made the car rock. Oh Chaz, oh silly Chaz, you had it backwards! For decades, drinkers and lonelyhearts in bars across America have made 5'o'clock their time to drink. You know, it's been a long day at the mill, and you've been working since 9 in the morning; by 5 PM, you deserve a fucking beer.
But the stoners, once the sixties and seventies were over and they got their heads straight, thought about 5'o'clock. They saw themselves, night after night, staring into a cold glass and wishing it was flaming grass. Instead of going out, they'd go home and smoke a J and flop down for some Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy.
But even that wasn't enough. What stoner could possibly toke up at 5 on-the-dot Do not all clocks tick slower towards that twelve, fighting gravity to the face's peak? Why not get high as the minute hand plunges into the basin of the next hour? Stoners are chill, so why not take the pressure off the minute hand and smoke at 5:20?
No! No, better still, make it 4:20! Why do we have to wait? "It's Five'o'clock somewhere?" Well it was 4:20 first, asshole!
Phew. Enough of that. On to a different revelation. I was reclining with Marina, discussing the politics of loyalty and friendship, when I thought of the concept for a play :
It would be a two-act, each played on a single set; one set would be the front side of a line of buildings and stores, and the other set would be the backside of the same buildings and stores. Each act would present the same period of time, though the front side would present a happy, cooperative and caring side of the goings on, and the back side would present a seedy, dishonest and scheming side of the plot. The events of each act would be anchored in time by certain events which occur on both sides simultanously (a loud noise or a bolt of lightning).
Then, once you have written this play, you can put the acts in whatever order you want. If you present the happy side first and the seedy side second, people will be disappointed by the revelation that seemingly good acts had deciet and nogoodnikry at their core. If you present the seedy side first and the happy side second, people will be pleasantly surprised to learn that the acts of treachery and evil all seemingly resulted in good things happening.
Just an idea, though.
Now it's time for bed.
-Alan
Chaz and I spent some bonding time together tonight. We each brought our own specialty to the table : I brought marijuana, and Chaz brought the frame of mind with which one permits themself to get intoxicated on a Tuesday. The result was glorious.
I, experienced in the ways of the mighty cheebah, was brought to my knees during one of Chaz's rants; you see, I had never before understood 4:20. While waiting at the White Castle drive-thru, I noticed that it was 7:20. I chucked and said "It's 4:20 somewhere".
Then Chaz said, "Hey, you know how stoners have 4:20? Like the time when you're supposed to smoke if you can? Well, I just realized that 5'o'clock is the drinker's 4:20!"
I shook so violently that I made the car rock. Oh Chaz, oh silly Chaz, you had it backwards! For decades, drinkers and lonelyhearts in bars across America have made 5'o'clock their time to drink. You know, it's been a long day at the mill, and you've been working since 9 in the morning; by 5 PM, you deserve a fucking beer.
But the stoners, once the sixties and seventies were over and they got their heads straight, thought about 5'o'clock. They saw themselves, night after night, staring into a cold glass and wishing it was flaming grass. Instead of going out, they'd go home and smoke a J and flop down for some Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy.
But even that wasn't enough. What stoner could possibly toke up at 5 on-the-dot Do not all clocks tick slower towards that twelve, fighting gravity to the face's peak? Why not get high as the minute hand plunges into the basin of the next hour? Stoners are chill, so why not take the pressure off the minute hand and smoke at 5:20?
No! No, better still, make it 4:20! Why do we have to wait? "It's Five'o'clock somewhere?" Well it was 4:20 first, asshole!
Phew. Enough of that. On to a different revelation. I was reclining with Marina, discussing the politics of loyalty and friendship, when I thought of the concept for a play :
It would be a two-act, each played on a single set; one set would be the front side of a line of buildings and stores, and the other set would be the backside of the same buildings and stores. Each act would present the same period of time, though the front side would present a happy, cooperative and caring side of the goings on, and the back side would present a seedy, dishonest and scheming side of the plot. The events of each act would be anchored in time by certain events which occur on both sides simultanously (a loud noise or a bolt of lightning).
Then, once you have written this play, you can put the acts in whatever order you want. If you present the happy side first and the seedy side second, people will be disappointed by the revelation that seemingly good acts had deciet and nogoodnikry at their core. If you present the seedy side first and the happy side second, people will be pleasantly surprised to learn that the acts of treachery and evil all seemingly resulted in good things happening.
Just an idea, though.
Now it's time for bed.
-Alan
posted by Alan Orlanski at 11:22 PM
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