Wise Up - Aimee Mann

Giving up so soon?

"It's not going to stop.
It's not going to stop.
It's not going to stop till you wise up."

This song is a bit prophetic. I first encountered it years back, when I saw Magnolia, but I only really came to appreciate it in Spring 2004, when I downloaded as much Aimee Mann as I could find. This song is kinda prophetic for two reasons :
1. "Wising Up" is essentially what I've been doing for the last few months (it is December 18th, 2004 today); the process of figuring out exactly why I have these recurring problems. I didn't really recognize my problems as recurring back when I made this mix.
2. The likely reason I put this song on this mix (trying to put myself back where I was, kinda struggling) is to express some of my emotional OCD tendencies, like my tendency to insist that I will fail, that I can't succeed, that it's not going to stop. I feel like "It's not going to stop" resonates in me so strongly, but I have no idea what "it" is. Sometimes I think the thing that never stops is "It's not going to stop," like the only cycle in my head is the cycle of the cycle. Sometimes I feel too fucked up for words.